Hand worship

Hand worship is a traditional act of submission in BDSM, a special case of Body worship, in which one of the partners (usually submissive, but can also be a simple fetishist) shows respect or physically adores the Dominant partner's hands. It is typically expressed in kissing and less often licking the palms and sucking the fingers of the Dominant's hands.

Hand worship can be practiced for fetishistic reasons - a partner's hands (strong male palms or delicate female hands, especially in gloves) can be a strong sexual stimulus for many fetishists. More often, however, hand worship is associated with relationships of Dominance and submission and the rules and protocols imposed by the Dominant (Dom, Domme, Master, Mistress).

In the context of BDSM, the acts of hand worship are usually part of a larger scenario that may include obedience training, domestic discipline, humiliation and degradation, corporal punishment, and more. In some cases hand worship can be a reward for the submissive, in others it can serve as a means to assert the power and authority of the Dominant.

When the act of worship is given as a reward, the submissive may be allowed not only to kiss the Dominant's hand, but also to express his adoration by rubbing his face in it, licking the palm, and sucking the fingers, giving expression to his emotions. Some Dominants encourage their submissives by rubbing their palms in their faces, putting a finger in their mouths commanding them to suck it, and even shoving a few fingers or their entire palm deep into their mouths. Such close contact with the Dominant's fingers and palms can be both intimate and highly arousing for many submissives, especially when the Dominant's actions are less gentle than pushy and controlling.

When the act of worship is intended to confirm the Dominant's authority, it will be limited to pressing the face into his palm as an expression of humility or a kiss of gratitude. In either case, the gesture would be highly formalized and the submissive would be expected to express his gratitude and appreciation to the Dominant as respectfully as possible.

Traditionally, kissing a woman's hand by a man is considered a respectful gesture and a display of good manners. At the same time, kissing a man's hand by a woman or the hand of a dignitary in connection with a request or as an expression of gratitude would, at least in the Western world, be considered extremely humiliating.

Most Dominants take into account precisely these aspects when developing the individual elements that should contain the act of hand worship by their submissives, further developing it according to their needs and imagination. In addition, to avoid possible ambiguity in the interpretation of the act as humiliating for the partner (especially when it comes to a Female Dominant and a male submissive), they usually require their submissive to kneel (while the Dominant himself stands or sits) and use phrases that are associated with humility or are obviously self-deprecating.

Particularly telling in this regard is the practice enforced by some Dominants of requiring their submissive partner to kiss their hand as an expression of gratitude for receiving corporal punishment ("And now thank the hand that punished you!"). In this case, the act of worship not only humiliates the submissive but also confirms the correctness of the punishment and affirms the role of the Dominant as a strict but fair disciplinarian. If necessary, the Dominant may further objectify and degrade the submissive by requiring him to kiss the instrument with which the punishment was inflicted (e.g. BDSM paddle for discipline).

In fact, hand worship can express adoration and gratitude in different situations and in various ways, and most Dominants develop a separate protocol for most of them. The most frequently elaborated forms of honoring the hand are those related to the expression of a request by the subordinate, the expression of gratitude for a decision made by the Dominant (e.g. to approve or reject the request), the expression of appreciation for an applied punishment, etc.

Apart from being a practical expression of the inequality between the partners, in these cases, the act of worship also plays the role of a physical connection between the submissive and his Dominant. The submissive's request may be refused, but the Dominant does not deny them. The punishment may have been harsh and humiliating, but the Dominant doesn't shy away from them. This is an important psychological point for the submissive that many Dominants do not realize, viewing worship as theater or looking for transcendent symbolism in it.

The psychological moment of worshiping the hand can be extremely powerful in the presence of third parties (e.g. other Dominants and submissives as participants in the BDSM scene or audience). In such cases, acts of worship, and especially hand worship, as both highly intimate and least disturbing to others, can create for the submissive structured environment which, from his first interactions with the Dominant, he associates with security and safety. To the bystander, acts of worship are beautiful and seen as a testament to the Dominant's skills, while to the submissive, they are a reminder that their partner has complete control over the situation.

For other forms of hand worship see glove worship.
For sexual attraction to hands, fingers, and nails, see hand fetishism (hand partialism).